Monday, November 15, 2010

Alright, California

Its the middle of November.
I understand I live in a more moderate climate these days.
But I'm not asking for snow.
Snow would be nice,
but I know that's hard for you
and I'm a reasonable person.
All I'm asking
is that a week from Thanksgiving
I can wear a sweater comfortably.
I mean, for Pete's sake, highs in the 70s?
What is that?!
If it can't be winter,
can it at least be fall?
Sheesh!!

Thursday, November 11, 2010



I love good a cappella (probably because I love music and I love to sing--but my own voice and ear are quite weak). This is one of my favorite hymns, performed by BYU a cappella group "Vocal Point". Give it a listen if you have a few minutes.

Things that made me smile today:

Seeing hubs snuggled up on the couch
with our little girl
Seeing little girl finally smile again
(she's pretty sick)

Realizing just how happy
a Gatorade
and a box of Mike and Ikes
can make my son.

Watching how much said boy
likes any song with a strong bass beat.
He's gonna be a drummer
or a bass player
or both.

When Dylan said,
"Do old people die sometimes?"
and I responded,
"Yes, like Clark died recently"
and he said,
"Yeah, and President Lincoln died"

Having Kylie and Doug
play tug-o-war,
with me.
He had my arms and torso,
she had a foot and an ankle.

Noticing that the flowers
Doug bought me
a week an a half ago
are still looking quite pretty.

Finding a good deal
on good shoes
that I really needed.

Feeling my baby kick
and remembering I am,
in fact,
pregnant.
Not just fat and miserable.


Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Adventures

I'm so glad that he's mine
and I'm his
and that we're in this together.
I feel a bit discombobulated tonight--
that is to say
I don't really know how I feel.
It doesn't feel like much has changed yet
but I know that a whole lot will change,
must change,
relatively soon.
But whatever else changes,
this stays.
This never goes away,
never becomes unreliable
and never gets boring.
(and, no,
I really don't
have any recent pictures
of the two of us.
Either he's taking pictures,
or I'm taking pictures,
so we're never in the picture at the same time.
I'll try to remedy that).


Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Changes

Tonight is the ending of an era. It may seem important only to a few, but important nonetheless. Scot, Doug's wonderful boss, officially announced his resignation on Friday, and at this evening's city council meeting an interim city manager will be named, to fill the post until the city council finds a permanent replacement.

Its been a privilege to be a little part of a vision that, though now much bigger than Scot alone, began and was realized largely because of his passion, faith and intense drive. He is one of those rare leaders whose passion and commitment is truly contagious, who has nearly as much concern for the lives and careers of those around him as he does for his own. He is a unique individual who chose a somewhat rocky and often lonely path, out of a desire to serve others, because he was able to see what could be. He has a generous heart, and many people have benefitted from his near tireless giving of himself. He will be sorely missed.

In the last few weeks, he has been publicly attacked and personally threatened, and even his children have had to deal with some harassment at school and in the community. It is unfortunate that sometimes people sink to the lesser aspects of human nature. It is especially unfortunate when children are involved. But the fact remains that those who have engaged in such behavior can't destroy anything of true value--the Townsends are good people, and so no matter what they decide to do or where they decide to go from here, they will be blessed. Those who have treated them unkindly will likely go on living mostly unhappy lives (people who behave in such a manner almost always do so because they are themselves unhappy).

When we moved to Lindsay 4 1/2 years ago, it seemed quite a bit different than it does now. I've seen many miracles, large and small, in that time. Many of those miracles came as a result of a humble, dedicated young bishop who said, "Let's open those doors; we'll fill this place up," and a visionary city manager who said, "Let's build it; let's find a way." I am more grateful than I can say that I am blessed to call both these men--and many, many of the other people who were absolutely instrumental in helping so many miracles happen here--my friends.

I wish I could express in any clear and meaningful way everything that has happened in our lives and around us since we came here. But there is too much, and my talents are inadequate to such a task. There has been so much opposition, in the forms of medical problems, antagonistic individuals, financial difficulties, family misunderstandings, and all kinds of other trials, and I have seen person after person and family after family rise to the occasion and make themselves and their little corner of the world a better place. I have seen unity in places it would seem most unlikely, and services large and small that were given and received in love and humility.

What this change in leadership will mean for us in particular is not quite clear yet. I'm sure it will be over time. But I have learned much in the last half-decade and I have tremendous faith in the Lord's ability and willingness to bless his children. Whatever happens, it has been amply proven to me that the Lord takes care of those who trust in him. Trials will come, sacrifices will sometimes have to be made, but the rewards reaped in the end seem always to me to be disproportionately large to what is asked. I am grateful to know that there is a plan--for myself, for my family and for all those that I love, even if I don't always know exactly what it is at any given moment.

Dream big, work hard, be patient and the possibilities are nearly endless.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Awesome Day

I have had a nasty cold all week. No, not nasty. Exhausting. I've only been a little cloudy and stuffy, but I've been totally wiped-out tired. Its been hard to find motivation to do basic chores, let alone everything else. Yesterday, I went back to bed after I dropped Keilana at school and fell asleep by about 8:30 and then slept until 10. After I dropped Dylan off at preschool and put Kylie down for a nap, I slept again for nearly an hour and a half. I felt like such a bum.

I'm so glad I did it.

This morning, as soon as I had dropped off Keilana, Kylie and I got to work. We cleaned up the dog mess out on the front patio and backyard, raked and cleaned up all the leaves, threw out our Halloween pumpkins, cleaned up strangers' trash (the one thing I hate about living here is that for some reason people seem to believe that, since its located at a major intersection, my front patio is a public trash can. . .grrrrrrr!), scrubbed the car and cleaned the kitchen. Then we got ourselves cleaned and dressed, and folded a couple loads of laundry. Then I cleaned up the living room and bedrooms and folded a couple more loads of laundry. After I dropped Dylan at preschool, I had to take a break because my back was telling me it was time to do that, so I sat down and had a snack with Kylie.

But meanwhile, Doug got all the old carpet/padding that we ripped out of our garage (the friends we bought it from had had it carpeted in order to use as a playroom--nice, in theory) loaded up and hauled away. Then, he put together the garden wall on the patio. It still needs gravel and glue and capstones, and then fill dirt and top soil, but we're a big step closer to finally, finally growing things.

I love days that are productive. Visible progress makes me sssooo happy.

Which is good. Because the last few weeks have been so supremely weird (and what the last few weeks mean for the next few months/years) that I just don't know what to do with it, emotionally.

So clean patios and houses make me happy.

Now off to make breakfast for dinner and watch Toy Story 3. And then after the kids go to bed, hubby gets home from work and I will sit down and watch The Good Guys and eat Halloween-discount fun size Snickers with him. And I shall feel satisfied and relaxed.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Gratitude

So I haven't written in two whole weeks. And for a few months before that, let's face it, most of my writing hasn't been terribly interesting or exciting.

Some of this is due to the mental and physical fatigue that's bound to occur when you're raising three busy kids while incubating a fourth. But a lot of it is just keeping my thoughts to myself.

Its not that there hasn't been plenty going on. Its not that I haven't had quite a few interesting insights, conversations and revelations. I just don't know how to share most of them, or if I even can. I just feel like keeping them to myself for now. There is a tendency in today's world for over-sharing. There are thoughts I've tried very hard to communicate because I think they can serve a purpose beyond myself, but there's always that wariness about giving too much away. Too many people do that, and often I think its done with little thought to the consequences that may follow--not only for themselves, but for others.

October was a very, very good month for us. I got out more in October than in the previous six months combined. We went on two all-evening child-free dates in one month! That's more dates than we often have in 10 months. But it was also a very stressful, tense month for us and for many of the people we care most about. Lindsay has been a contentious place the last several weeks, and so we needed all the fun, I think, to help maintain some sanity in the midst of the opposition and tension. There had to be some balance.

I wasn't sure I wanted to live in Lindsay when I first got here. Now I am so in love with my friends, my ward, the life we have most of the time, that it's hard to imagine having made any other choice. I know there were many good reasons we came here, not all of which we could've possibly known when we made the decision. I'm grateful that this is where our life has brought us. In the midst of the vitriol and opposition, I looked around at those who were there to say "thank you" to many others for the hard work they've done; I saw how many people were willing to face an ugly confrontation in order to stand by their friends; I realized that, though we sometimes lose sight of it when climbing a hard hill, most people are still basically good and decent and courageous.

I start my month of Thanksgiving with a fervent prayer of gratitude for the friends that the Lord has placed in my life, and how they have shown me how to be the person I want to be simply by being the people that they are. I am truly blessed.