Half a decade:)

Today is Doug and I's fifth anniversary.  Its been a fantastic five years overall.  Though there have been moments where I wanted to strangle him :) he politely points out that's not an option and we forge on ahead.

Its been fun to get to know him better.  He wasn't exactly what I thought I was looking for, so it probably a good thing I let the Lord point the direction for me, because as it turns out he's pretty much perfect for me.  His personality is Type-A enough that I always feel protected, something I have no problem admitting that I needed in many ways, but when it comes right down to it he's quite sensitive and emotional, so I never feel bowled over.  He understands remarkably well how women think and function (thank you, Katy!), even if I sometimes tease him that he's not always great about employing that knowledge.  He dotes on his little girl, showering her with the attention and affection I always wanted a husband to show my daughters, and he loves to wrestle with his little boy and encourage all those oh-so-boyish obsessions that mark his personality.   It is obvious in watching him play and cuddle with them that he adores his children, and that always makes me love him more.  He has a demanding job that requires a great deal of time and energy (and involves a whole lot of stress), but he has become incredibly wonderful about not bringing the stress of work home with him--a bad day with a coworker doesn't mean a snappy evening for us.  Usually these days it means a lightened mood by playing with the kids.

The truth is, our marriage is far better than either one of us deserves.  The whole is far greater than the sum of its parts, and for that I can never express strongly enough my gratitude to the Lord for leading us to each other, especially since neither one of us thought the other was what we wanted.   We've grown to appreciate each other's strengths more and more over the last few years, and learned how to best help one another with our weaknesses.  Because of that, though we do unfortunately still get the worst of each other (as is usually the case with the people you love most), we certainly get more of the best of each other than anyone else.  I've always treated him like I expected the best out of him and consequently that's usually what he's been for me.  

I've always had the tendency to withhold a lot in order to keep the peace with people and make sure that those around me get what they want. He's so sensitive to that and wanting me to get what I want that half the time if we're out he'll get upset if I don't pick which fast food joint to eat at.  He defers to my judgment more often than I would expect most people, too, and his trust in me pushes me to be better.  In a recent email to a friend he wrote: "I am very lucky.  I have faith in the temple covenant I've made and its saving power. . .I have a wife whose righteousness far exceeds mine.  I don't say that as undue flattery towards her.  I don't have to, I get told it by just about everyone that know us. . .I would feel like a second class citizen at times, except it is true."  When that is how he views me, how can I not want to be better, to push myself to live worthy of such an assessment?

The fact is, we are best friends.  He is the person I can talk to about any and everything (far too often until 2 or 3 in the morning, I'm afraid).  He is the person I most enjoy learning with, traveling with, recreating with and working with.  I hope that many other women are as lucky as I am. :)