Resolving

About a year and a half ago, I took a line from a little-sung Christmas song and tried to make it my personal motto:

Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me.

Since then, there have been times I've done better than others. As a whole, I think I've been become better at peacemaking as a lifestyle. Where I have undoubtedly struggled with it most is with my in-laws, who have had the misfortune of seeing more of the worst of me and less of the best of me than just about anyone else in my life. But since I have the good fortune of having in-laws who love me in spite of that, I'm getting better with them, too ('cause, really, they are pretty awesome, all in all). I have not been great about that in the last few months, but I've been better in the last two weeks than I have in a long, long time.

So I want to add to that resolution, in hopes of continuing success in that personal progress. And I admit that I'm ripping off another song lyric to do it. For 2010, the idea that I'd like to apply to my life is:

With my own two hands

That encompasses all the things I want to accomplish this year so well. I want to learn to knit (seriously, for lack of time, money, space, energy, you-name-the-excuse, I have horribly neglected my own skills and talents in some ways in recent years). I want to practice photography more and take the time to apply the knowledge I've accumulated (and accumulate more knowledge) to get it right and get the pictures I want, rather than doing things haphazardly and getting almost the picture I want. I want to brush up on my writing, rather than always waiting until I'm exhausted to put pen to paper. I want to get more consistent with family home evening, and finally have a clear game plan on how to do that. I want to get better at reaching out to people--about stepping outside of myself to take the first step. That is not something that comes naturally to me, and it is something at which I quite frequently fail. I'm not always very good at reaching back when someone else takes the first step, frankly.

I know that's a lot to bite off in one year. But none of these things are 12-month skills, they're all lifetime goals. I just want to start doing better this year, because I finally have a clear picture of what I want, how to get there, and what my personal weaknesses and obstacles are in the way of those things--and most importantly, I finally have a clear picture of how to get over those obstacles and the confidence to do it.

What happens in my life and who I become are on me. Not my parents, friends, husband or kids. So I want to start making my little world (and, hopefully, the big, big world as a result) a little bit better, with my own two hands.